People always ask at what age do they retire? My answer is always between the ages of eight and ten. I can’t believe that Calvin, my Guide Dog has turned eight. We really have entered the final stages of our partnership. Although on his birthday, you wouldn’t have thought it as he was the most playful and energetic he has been in a long time. After the thousandth time of throwing his ball or toy my enthusiasm was wavering ever so slightly. Nevertheless, it was his birthday so I heroically persevered and kept launching until he eventually got bored. At times like that it is easy to forget that he’s nearing retirement.
We have our annual visit from Guide Dogs on 6 April and I’m hopeful that they will authorise for him to work for another year. The only concern health wise at the moment are his joints. Calvin’s bones click constantly as he runs up and down the stairs. On occasion if he’s been resting for a while his back legs stiffen too. Not that this bothers him, but it is a little jaw dropping when I hear him slip down a step as he attempts to charge up to the landing. All credit to him he powers it through. The vets started him on some joint supplements and I’m fairly sure they made a difference after about a week. Less clicking and no stair scares for a while now. The vet was surprised that they have had such a dramatic influence, but I’m convinced it’s not in my head. Yes, they are definitely working, on cue Calvin has come to join me upstairs to see what I’m up to and I didn’t hear a single click.
I would write more, only Calvin is nudging me to play, so I best go and entertain and make the most of his company whilst I still can.
The Calvin8r: Young at heart, works hard, plays harder.
Tuesday, 29 March 2016
Thursday, 10 March 2016
Big Brother
Last Tuesday my brother turned thirty and my family and I spent three nights in Lanzarote to celebrate. I don’t think I’ve ever properly blogged about my brother before. Like me, he has Norrie’s Disease (also known as Norrie Disease), which is a rare genetic condition that primarily affects the eyes. However, whilst I gradually lost my sight, my brother has congenital blindness accompanied with severe learning difficulties. I know we are all individuals, but I have never met anyone similar to my brother before. His additional needs are quite unique.
In some ways he is quite able, as he can walk and is continent. These are two abilities my family and I are very grateful for. However, his comprehension and communication skills are extremely limited. He definitely understands more than he can express though. For example, my brother is unable to tell you his feelings. He can’t say if he’s feeling happy, sad or is in pain. Yet, he knows the words for a million and one food types and remembers the words to songs. Although, his renditions aren’t always accurate. They are making me smile just thinking about them. He can count to ten sometimes likewise if you ask him his name, age or where he lives he may answer correctly. Mostly, he repeats what you say instead. When my brother was younger it was a miracle if he spoke at all and when his voice broke it obviously confused him and he was quiet for a long time afterwards. He makes noises that we know means he’s happy, but scares the public as he is loud with it. Generally, when my brother speaks now he shouts and when he shouts he repeats himself over and over again. This can be really challenging. In more recent years he has become a little aggressive both to himself and others. At his worst he has drawn blood and lashed out. I think the worst that has happened to me is being grabbed in a head lock, pinched, scratched, generally grabbed and tapped very hard. Personally, even though I can’t see the danger coming, I’m pretty good at getting my brother to release me or move swiftly far enough away so I’m out of arms length since he can’t see to get up and chase me. When we get reports back that he’s injured one of his carers, I often wonder how they let it happen to themselves since they are professionally trained. If I can wriggle my way out of harm, how are they getting chunks of their hair pulled out?!
My brother has high energy levels and requires little sleep. He stays up late entertaining himself in his bedroom by walking around feeling, smelling and throwing things. He knows his way around my parents house unaided and goes to the toilet if he needs it. Nevertheless, he sometimes goes for no particular reason and then needs to be sorted out afterwards. He can’t wash, dress or properly feed himself. If he eats by himself with his hands he will eat at a hundred miles an hour. He needs fulltime care, which is tough on my parents especially now they are getting older. He is a strong fully grown man.
He has an interesting relationship with Calvin. I hadn’t had Calvin long when my brother accidently trod on him one evening. Calvin yelped out in pain, but funnily enough always moves now whenever he sees my brother coming. I’ve tripped over and trampled on Calvin numerous times, but he never moves for me. Calvin and my brother both have toys. Yet Calvin knows not to touch my brother’s ones. If my brother picks up one of Calvin’s toys by mistake, Calvin goes and tells someone by looking from the toy to an adult. He never goes and retrieves it himself. If my brother is relaxing on the sofa, Calvin occasionally goes and plonks himself in front of my brother wanting him to stroke him. My brother doesn’t realise Calvin is there, so Calvin helpfully nudges him with his nose. Then my brother will stroke Calvin, tap him, pull his ears, which Calvin thinks is great then rolls on to his back then we have to tell Calvin off for exposing his bits. He’s lucky that they are still attached! My brother likes to have a quilt when he’s on the sofa. I’m not sure how or when this happened, but Calvin now also needs a quilt when my brother has his. Calvin will put his head on my lap, look over to my brother and keep repeating the action until he has a quilt too. I think Calvin reckons he’s my brother’s equal. They are both Pisces I suppose.
It frustrates me when professionals suggest my brother has autism. Yes he likes routine, but just as much as the next person. It’s not as if he has a meltdown if his routine is changed, such as having toast for breakfast instead of porridge. Yes he may have shouted for porridge for an hour, but ultimately any food will do. My brother also knows that he can’t get certain things on holiday necessarily like having a hot chocolate before bed. This doesn’t bother him in the slightest. In fact, my brother generally behaves better on holiday. He loves the sunshine and will be quite content with sunbathing. He enjoys listening to the waves and playing with the sand on the beach. Similarly, he enjoys going on the plane. The vibrations and sound are weirdly calming for him.
Other quirks of my brother’s are that he takes his top off and a shoe without warning. We could be out shopping and he will be walking and somehow kick a shoe off. This can be done without us realising. The funniest was last year when we went to Fuerteventura. We were late for check in. So my mum, brother and I went to check in whilst my dad parked the car. My dad met us at security about half an hour later brandishing my brother’s shoe that he happened to find at the entrance. We had no idea my brother had been walking around with only one shoe on and clearly despite the multitude of passengers nobody had thought to pick up his shoe at any point.
Unlike many families with disabled children, my parents never send my brother to respite care. This is because he is unable to tell us what it’s like and whether he’s being treated fairly. It is also because respite centres don’t really do any activities with those in their care. My parents said they’d feel guilty knowing that he’s in an unfamiliar environment with strangers not being engaged, which I totally understand. Yet there will come a point when they won’t be able to care for my brother all of the time and difficult decisions will have to be made.
Growing up with a sibling who has a disability more severe than your own is probably quite a rare experience. Usually having a big brother means you have someone to fight with when you’re younger and a protector when you’re older. In my case despite being the little sister I am the protector. I’m very vocal when it comes to organising my brother’s care and I’m aware that one day it will be my full responsibility. In lots of ways my brother is lucky. He has a loving family and does fun activities day in day out never having the stress of adult life. Though it must be incredibly frustrating for him not to be able to verbally complain or express his emotions. It’s great that he does laugh hysterically and smile broadly on a daily basis. In turn he cracks me up all of the time with his ways and even knows how to embarrass me in public when he exclaims ‘Selina’s crying’ every time he hears a baby scream. The perfect big brother.
In some ways he is quite able, as he can walk and is continent. These are two abilities my family and I are very grateful for. However, his comprehension and communication skills are extremely limited. He definitely understands more than he can express though. For example, my brother is unable to tell you his feelings. He can’t say if he’s feeling happy, sad or is in pain. Yet, he knows the words for a million and one food types and remembers the words to songs. Although, his renditions aren’t always accurate. They are making me smile just thinking about them. He can count to ten sometimes likewise if you ask him his name, age or where he lives he may answer correctly. Mostly, he repeats what you say instead. When my brother was younger it was a miracle if he spoke at all and when his voice broke it obviously confused him and he was quiet for a long time afterwards. He makes noises that we know means he’s happy, but scares the public as he is loud with it. Generally, when my brother speaks now he shouts and when he shouts he repeats himself over and over again. This can be really challenging. In more recent years he has become a little aggressive both to himself and others. At his worst he has drawn blood and lashed out. I think the worst that has happened to me is being grabbed in a head lock, pinched, scratched, generally grabbed and tapped very hard. Personally, even though I can’t see the danger coming, I’m pretty good at getting my brother to release me or move swiftly far enough away so I’m out of arms length since he can’t see to get up and chase me. When we get reports back that he’s injured one of his carers, I often wonder how they let it happen to themselves since they are professionally trained. If I can wriggle my way out of harm, how are they getting chunks of their hair pulled out?!
My brother has high energy levels and requires little sleep. He stays up late entertaining himself in his bedroom by walking around feeling, smelling and throwing things. He knows his way around my parents house unaided and goes to the toilet if he needs it. Nevertheless, he sometimes goes for no particular reason and then needs to be sorted out afterwards. He can’t wash, dress or properly feed himself. If he eats by himself with his hands he will eat at a hundred miles an hour. He needs fulltime care, which is tough on my parents especially now they are getting older. He is a strong fully grown man.
He has an interesting relationship with Calvin. I hadn’t had Calvin long when my brother accidently trod on him one evening. Calvin yelped out in pain, but funnily enough always moves now whenever he sees my brother coming. I’ve tripped over and trampled on Calvin numerous times, but he never moves for me. Calvin and my brother both have toys. Yet Calvin knows not to touch my brother’s ones. If my brother picks up one of Calvin’s toys by mistake, Calvin goes and tells someone by looking from the toy to an adult. He never goes and retrieves it himself. If my brother is relaxing on the sofa, Calvin occasionally goes and plonks himself in front of my brother wanting him to stroke him. My brother doesn’t realise Calvin is there, so Calvin helpfully nudges him with his nose. Then my brother will stroke Calvin, tap him, pull his ears, which Calvin thinks is great then rolls on to his back then we have to tell Calvin off for exposing his bits. He’s lucky that they are still attached! My brother likes to have a quilt when he’s on the sofa. I’m not sure how or when this happened, but Calvin now also needs a quilt when my brother has his. Calvin will put his head on my lap, look over to my brother and keep repeating the action until he has a quilt too. I think Calvin reckons he’s my brother’s equal. They are both Pisces I suppose.
It frustrates me when professionals suggest my brother has autism. Yes he likes routine, but just as much as the next person. It’s not as if he has a meltdown if his routine is changed, such as having toast for breakfast instead of porridge. Yes he may have shouted for porridge for an hour, but ultimately any food will do. My brother also knows that he can’t get certain things on holiday necessarily like having a hot chocolate before bed. This doesn’t bother him in the slightest. In fact, my brother generally behaves better on holiday. He loves the sunshine and will be quite content with sunbathing. He enjoys listening to the waves and playing with the sand on the beach. Similarly, he enjoys going on the plane. The vibrations and sound are weirdly calming for him.
Other quirks of my brother’s are that he takes his top off and a shoe without warning. We could be out shopping and he will be walking and somehow kick a shoe off. This can be done without us realising. The funniest was last year when we went to Fuerteventura. We were late for check in. So my mum, brother and I went to check in whilst my dad parked the car. My dad met us at security about half an hour later brandishing my brother’s shoe that he happened to find at the entrance. We had no idea my brother had been walking around with only one shoe on and clearly despite the multitude of passengers nobody had thought to pick up his shoe at any point.
Unlike many families with disabled children, my parents never send my brother to respite care. This is because he is unable to tell us what it’s like and whether he’s being treated fairly. It is also because respite centres don’t really do any activities with those in their care. My parents said they’d feel guilty knowing that he’s in an unfamiliar environment with strangers not being engaged, which I totally understand. Yet there will come a point when they won’t be able to care for my brother all of the time and difficult decisions will have to be made.
Growing up with a sibling who has a disability more severe than your own is probably quite a rare experience. Usually having a big brother means you have someone to fight with when you’re younger and a protector when you’re older. In my case despite being the little sister I am the protector. I’m very vocal when it comes to organising my brother’s care and I’m aware that one day it will be my full responsibility. In lots of ways my brother is lucky. He has a loving family and does fun activities day in day out never having the stress of adult life. Though it must be incredibly frustrating for him not to be able to verbally complain or express his emotions. It’s great that he does laugh hysterically and smile broadly on a daily basis. In turn he cracks me up all of the time with his ways and even knows how to embarrass me in public when he exclaims ‘Selina’s crying’ every time he hears a baby scream. The perfect big brother.
Wednesday, 24 February 2016
Be My Eyes
Be My Eyes is an app that has been around for a while now. However, I’m always late to the party and only got around to trying it out last week. It is an app that is designed for the visually impaired to enable them to borrow a pair of eyes on demand. It requires sighted volunteers to sign up and offer a few seconds or minutes of their time when needed. It is a pretty simple, but effective concept. The visually impaired person requests assistance via the app, then a registered sighted person will receive a video call. If the sighted person is busy, they can reject the call and the app will try another sighted helper. There are about sixteen times the amount of sighted people registered compared to visually impaired, so the likely hood of being contacted is quite slim. Nevertheless, if you are and available to answer, you can feel good that you have helped a visually impaired person out and the recipient will definitely be grateful of the assistance.
Luckily for me despite living by myself, I am in regular contact with sighted people. So I have plenty of opportunities to ask for a working pair of eyes to check things for me. However, last week it was fairly late and I needed to know what denomination a note was in my purse before I travelled the next morning. I was fairly sure it was £5 or £10, but couldn’t remember and had no other notes to measure it against. After a little reluctance, I decided to use Be My Eyes. I was a little hesitant at first, as I got phone phobia. There’s something a bit scary about talking to and trusting a stranger. I was worried that the person would be able to see my face, though a friend assured me that the app uses the back facing camera. I’m not sure why I wanted to keep my anonymity, perhaps I felt embarrassed that I needed help for such a basic task.
Anyway, once I remembered I needed to turn on my light (it is really bad that I live in the dark the majority of the time), I took the plunge. I was slightly alarmed when an automated voice started speaking to me, he was saying something along the lines that he was trying to connect me to the next available helper and there was some pleasant music whilst I waited. It couldn’t have been more than a minute before a young female answered with a West Country lilt. I put on my best phone voice, as you do and spoke very formally when asking what the denomination of my note was, crossing my fingers that it was actually in view of the camera. She politely told me it was £10, I thanked her and we said our goodbyes. It was so easy and somewhat refreshing knowing there was someone out there willing to give up part of their Friday night to help me.
Now I’ve gotten over my silly fears, I’ll certainly be using the app again in future. I do despise technology at times, but it really can be a wonderful thing.
I highly recommend Be My Eyes, search for it in the app store and sign up today.
Luckily for me despite living by myself, I am in regular contact with sighted people. So I have plenty of opportunities to ask for a working pair of eyes to check things for me. However, last week it was fairly late and I needed to know what denomination a note was in my purse before I travelled the next morning. I was fairly sure it was £5 or £10, but couldn’t remember and had no other notes to measure it against. After a little reluctance, I decided to use Be My Eyes. I was a little hesitant at first, as I got phone phobia. There’s something a bit scary about talking to and trusting a stranger. I was worried that the person would be able to see my face, though a friend assured me that the app uses the back facing camera. I’m not sure why I wanted to keep my anonymity, perhaps I felt embarrassed that I needed help for such a basic task.
Anyway, once I remembered I needed to turn on my light (it is really bad that I live in the dark the majority of the time), I took the plunge. I was slightly alarmed when an automated voice started speaking to me, he was saying something along the lines that he was trying to connect me to the next available helper and there was some pleasant music whilst I waited. It couldn’t have been more than a minute before a young female answered with a West Country lilt. I put on my best phone voice, as you do and spoke very formally when asking what the denomination of my note was, crossing my fingers that it was actually in view of the camera. She politely told me it was £10, I thanked her and we said our goodbyes. It was so easy and somewhat refreshing knowing there was someone out there willing to give up part of their Friday night to help me.
Now I’ve gotten over my silly fears, I’ll certainly be using the app again in future. I do despise technology at times, but it really can be a wonderful thing.
I highly recommend Be My Eyes, search for it in the app store and sign up today.
Wednesday, 3 February 2016
Let's Take It Further
I have been blogging since 2008, which is a crazy amount of time. It is nice to have a record of the last eight years of my life even if some of my posts are cringe central. Blogging is something I find quite therapeutic and I have always said that I write just for me, but it is a bonus if other people enjoy my writing too.
At present, I post new blog posts on my Twitter account (@selinalitt). However, I feel it is time to take things one step further and have created a page for my blog on Face Book. I’ve noticed it’s the in thing to do these days. So if you want to keep up to date with new posts, just click here and like my page.
At present, I post new blog posts on my Twitter account (@selinalitt). However, I feel it is time to take things one step further and have created a page for my blog on Face Book. I’ve noticed it’s the in thing to do these days. So if you want to keep up to date with new posts, just click here and like my page.
Friday, 29 January 2016
Death in Paradise
Death. Even just thinking about the word makes me wince. It evokes images of black, darkness, doom. Yet nobody can escape it. It is our final destination. There’s nothing scarier than the unknown. I believe this is why when we lose a loved one, it causes us to go on an emotional rollercoaster. All we can do is hold on tight and ride it out.
In September, my Grandma who I used to call Nanima died. It all happened so fast, we never got the chance to say goodbye. I loved the fact that she lived in Mauritius, one of the most beautiful countries in the world. However, it meant she was alone at the end.
Last month my mum and I travelled out there to put her affairs in order and to say a proper goodbye. It may sound strange, but despite the sombre situation, I still enjoyed my time in Mauritius.
When I visit Mauritius, I feel at ease and can fully understand why my Grandma chose to live there. Whilst I’m British born and bred, I can’t resist being absorbed by the Mauritian culture. It rained at some point everyday whilst we were there, but it was hot rain. It made me giddy sloshing through warm puddles in my flip flops. It made me smile when a car tooted its horn at me, something that’s been happening since my first visit when I was eleven. It makes me feel like a local, included. The fresh beach cuisine is amazing, simple food, spectacular food. The soft sand, the wistful waves. The buses that hurtle at crazy speeds. My mum’s aunties, my family that fuss over you, tell you you’ve put on weight then feed you until you’re about to explode. Happy, strong, loving and lovely ladies. The sega sound that instantly results in you jiggling your hips. The common carefree Creole language. The purity of the people. My heritage.
No country is perfect though. Tourism has significantly helped Mauritius to develop, but poverty is still rife. The education system appears to be exceptional, much tougher than in England. Nevertheless, many of the younger generation appear to be heading overseas to find work, as it doesn’t seem to be available in Mauritius, which is such a shame. The roads have improved remarkably, yet I know road traffic accidents are a major problem. The healthcare service is also obviously nowhere as near advanced as here. When we visited my Grandma at the cemetery, a surprisingly modern peaceful space, I asked my mum to read some gravestones out to me, as I was curious to know who my Grandma was near. I found it heartbreaking to learn that so many of the graves were occupied by young people. People in their teens, twenties, thirties, forties. My Grandma was one of the oldest at 78. That says a lot about the country, which I never really realised since my Great-Grandma lived into her nineties in Mauritius.
I look like my mum and she looks like her mum. This means I look like my Grandma. In fact my mum has always told me how alike we are and as I got older I began to notice the similarities between me and my Grandma too. I also possess many of my mum’s features, but I’m most like my Grandma. The things we had in common include: a needle phobia, weak bladder, taking vitamins, being healthy, mannerisms, always direct/blunt, good organisational skills, needing our own space, stubbornness, an interest in words, tough love, hatred for the cold and most importantly a strong will. My Grandma had a lot of knocks in her life, but she always got back up again.
My mum says it is unlikely that she will return to her childhood home again. I’m determined to go back one day, maybe with my own child so they can hopefully experience the Mauritian culture and treasure it as much as I do. I’m so grateful that my Grandma decided to live in Mauritius, otherwise I may have never got the opportunity to learn about and appreciate my roots.
Forever in my heart
In September, my Grandma who I used to call Nanima died. It all happened so fast, we never got the chance to say goodbye. I loved the fact that she lived in Mauritius, one of the most beautiful countries in the world. However, it meant she was alone at the end.
Last month my mum and I travelled out there to put her affairs in order and to say a proper goodbye. It may sound strange, but despite the sombre situation, I still enjoyed my time in Mauritius.
When I visit Mauritius, I feel at ease and can fully understand why my Grandma chose to live there. Whilst I’m British born and bred, I can’t resist being absorbed by the Mauritian culture. It rained at some point everyday whilst we were there, but it was hot rain. It made me giddy sloshing through warm puddles in my flip flops. It made me smile when a car tooted its horn at me, something that’s been happening since my first visit when I was eleven. It makes me feel like a local, included. The fresh beach cuisine is amazing, simple food, spectacular food. The soft sand, the wistful waves. The buses that hurtle at crazy speeds. My mum’s aunties, my family that fuss over you, tell you you’ve put on weight then feed you until you’re about to explode. Happy, strong, loving and lovely ladies. The sega sound that instantly results in you jiggling your hips. The common carefree Creole language. The purity of the people. My heritage.
No country is perfect though. Tourism has significantly helped Mauritius to develop, but poverty is still rife. The education system appears to be exceptional, much tougher than in England. Nevertheless, many of the younger generation appear to be heading overseas to find work, as it doesn’t seem to be available in Mauritius, which is such a shame. The roads have improved remarkably, yet I know road traffic accidents are a major problem. The healthcare service is also obviously nowhere as near advanced as here. When we visited my Grandma at the cemetery, a surprisingly modern peaceful space, I asked my mum to read some gravestones out to me, as I was curious to know who my Grandma was near. I found it heartbreaking to learn that so many of the graves were occupied by young people. People in their teens, twenties, thirties, forties. My Grandma was one of the oldest at 78. That says a lot about the country, which I never really realised since my Great-Grandma lived into her nineties in Mauritius.
I look like my mum and she looks like her mum. This means I look like my Grandma. In fact my mum has always told me how alike we are and as I got older I began to notice the similarities between me and my Grandma too. I also possess many of my mum’s features, but I’m most like my Grandma. The things we had in common include: a needle phobia, weak bladder, taking vitamins, being healthy, mannerisms, always direct/blunt, good organisational skills, needing our own space, stubbornness, an interest in words, tough love, hatred for the cold and most importantly a strong will. My Grandma had a lot of knocks in her life, but she always got back up again.
My mum says it is unlikely that she will return to her childhood home again. I’m determined to go back one day, maybe with my own child so they can hopefully experience the Mauritian culture and treasure it as much as I do. I’m so grateful that my Grandma decided to live in Mauritius, otherwise I may have never got the opportunity to learn about and appreciate my roots.
Forever in my heart
Sunday, 3 January 2016
Reflections to Ambitions
2015
I’m sitting here on New Year’s Eve in my Tinker Bell pyjamas contemplating life. A sprinkling of fairy dust allowing me to fly away to a Neverland feels like the perfect solution to life’s problems. However, it doesn’t solve them and even Neverland has its troubles. The thing about life is that we never exactly know what it’s going to throw at us, but we do know that it flings the good, the bad and the ugly. Our task is to embrace, battle and defeat. This year has proved to be one of my hardest yet.
The job didn’t work out, I didn’t run a PB for the second year running, my last remaining Grandparent passed away and somehow my relationship failed. These types of events leave you asking questions and have left me feeling a little lost.
Nevertheless, my year hasn’t all been doom and gloom. I have lived on my own for a year now. In that time I have only broken 1 plate, 1 bowl and 1 condiment shaker. Also, I’ve only dropped 2 dinners on my cream coloured carpet, the same amount Calvin decided to spew up too. My hoover has a few plasters on its cable that it chose to chew up one day and I seem to have misplaced a coaster causing my table to look slightly strange, but other than that independent living is going well.
Whilst paid employment let me down, voluntary work has kept me busy. Action for the Blind, Vista and Brownies have all enabled me to remain sane. I really enjoy giving something back to the world.
It feels wrong not to write a little note about Calvin, so I will. Apologies to Calvin fans as I didn’t write a blog post to mark our 6 year anniversary. We haven’t really had any adventures lately. Calvin is Calvin, my little bundle of sunshine, always ready to thrust a toy in my face. It’s impossible not to smile every morning when you’re greeted with such genuine excitement and affection.
2016
As I write we are already 3 days in. Happy Olympic and Paralympic Year! Honestly, where have the last 4 years gone?! London 2012 is still so vivid in my memory. Rio 2016 is going to be incredible, I can’t wait to watch it all on TV.
I am not going to kid myself or others. Realistically I have no chance of being able to compete in Rio. In 2015 I ranked 25th in the World, which purely and simply is not good enough. My main goal this year is to run a PB. It needs to happen. I dedicate my life to athletics, surely I deserve that at least. If my indoor season goes well, then I think I will start to cross my fingers that I may be selected for the Europeans in July. Ideally, I would like to rank in the top 3 in Europe by the end of 2016. In 2015 I finished 5th in the rankings. I have my first indoor race on 9 January.
I am not sure what else I want out of this year. Sadly, my ambitious nature seems to be wilting. This is out of order. I need to get a grip, have more faith in my abilities and start aspiring to be someone again. I think everyone is capable of some sort of greatness. No, scrap that, I KNOW we are all capable of being great!
Let’s all have a great year...
I’m sitting here on New Year’s Eve in my Tinker Bell pyjamas contemplating life. A sprinkling of fairy dust allowing me to fly away to a Neverland feels like the perfect solution to life’s problems. However, it doesn’t solve them and even Neverland has its troubles. The thing about life is that we never exactly know what it’s going to throw at us, but we do know that it flings the good, the bad and the ugly. Our task is to embrace, battle and defeat. This year has proved to be one of my hardest yet.
The job didn’t work out, I didn’t run a PB for the second year running, my last remaining Grandparent passed away and somehow my relationship failed. These types of events leave you asking questions and have left me feeling a little lost.
Nevertheless, my year hasn’t all been doom and gloom. I have lived on my own for a year now. In that time I have only broken 1 plate, 1 bowl and 1 condiment shaker. Also, I’ve only dropped 2 dinners on my cream coloured carpet, the same amount Calvin decided to spew up too. My hoover has a few plasters on its cable that it chose to chew up one day and I seem to have misplaced a coaster causing my table to look slightly strange, but other than that independent living is going well.
Whilst paid employment let me down, voluntary work has kept me busy. Action for the Blind, Vista and Brownies have all enabled me to remain sane. I really enjoy giving something back to the world.
It feels wrong not to write a little note about Calvin, so I will. Apologies to Calvin fans as I didn’t write a blog post to mark our 6 year anniversary. We haven’t really had any adventures lately. Calvin is Calvin, my little bundle of sunshine, always ready to thrust a toy in my face. It’s impossible not to smile every morning when you’re greeted with such genuine excitement and affection.
2016
As I write we are already 3 days in. Happy Olympic and Paralympic Year! Honestly, where have the last 4 years gone?! London 2012 is still so vivid in my memory. Rio 2016 is going to be incredible, I can’t wait to watch it all on TV.
I am not going to kid myself or others. Realistically I have no chance of being able to compete in Rio. In 2015 I ranked 25th in the World, which purely and simply is not good enough. My main goal this year is to run a PB. It needs to happen. I dedicate my life to athletics, surely I deserve that at least. If my indoor season goes well, then I think I will start to cross my fingers that I may be selected for the Europeans in July. Ideally, I would like to rank in the top 3 in Europe by the end of 2016. In 2015 I finished 5th in the rankings. I have my first indoor race on 9 January.
I am not sure what else I want out of this year. Sadly, my ambitious nature seems to be wilting. This is out of order. I need to get a grip, have more faith in my abilities and start aspiring to be someone again. I think everyone is capable of some sort of greatness. No, scrap that, I KNOW we are all capable of being great!
Let’s all have a great year...
Tuesday, 10 November 2015
Talking Books
Today, RNIB are celebrating 80 years since the launch of their Talking Book service for blind and partially sighted readers. Personally, I have been using the service for about five years now and would be lost without it. Books offer so much including entertainment, education and escapism. Up until now, I have paid an annual fee of £50 in order to take advantage of the service, but was pleasantly surprised to learn today that RNIB are scrapping the fee, so from here on Talking Books are free to loan.
Recently, my portable Daisy player broke, which is a device needed to access Talking Books. As is the case for most products for the visually impaired, it would have been very pricey for me to replace it, approximately £300. Although a bit hesitant at first due to my lack of ability when it comes to technology (long live my Nokia with Talks), I decided to trial Overdrive. Overdrive is a relatively new service offered by RNIB, which allows its users to directly download Talking Books to their smart device. The app also links to other libraries, but I’m yet to master that side of things.
I have had my ipod touch for about 18 months now, which I originally got to help me learn how to use a touch screen, knowing that one day my trusty nokia will pack in (nooooo) and I’ll have to transfer to the Apple world. Having little patience for difficult tasks, well technology in general, I found myself only using my ipod touch to tell Sirri to ‘play music’ and ask him silly questions like ‘how much do you weigh?’. Hence, getting Overdrive was a big step. Maybe I should give myself more credit for my abilities or maybe the app is just really simple to use that even I can manage it with little trouble. The search facility is easily found, you just tap the ‘borrow’ button to obviously ‘borrow’ a book and then you go to your bookshelf on the RNIB Library to download the book to the app. The Overdrive app is VI friendly with clear controls for play, pause, rewind etc. I like that you can increase the speed of a book too, but I believe that facility is only available on IOS devices (if that’s what they are called). Nothing is perfect and the downside to the app is returning books with Voice Over enabled. It is really temperamental, sometimes the options appear, but more often than not when you double tap and hold, it begins to play the book instead. Nevertheless, each book you download has an expiry date, which you can choose to be 14 or 21 days and then the book will return itself to the library. You can checkout six books at a time. Overall, I’m satisfied and would definitely recommend it. It beats sending RNIB a list of books you want to read and then wait for the CDs to arrive in the post.
Whilst the Talking Books service is great, my only gripe with it is that a few times now, I have begun to read books in a series, only to find that RNIB don’t have the entire series and due to commercial reasons won’t be getting them either. I have had this problem with authors, such as Ally Condie, Veronica Roth, Charlaine Harris and P.C. and Kristin Cast. It’s quite frustrating, will I ever find out what happens next?! At present I am hooked on books written by experienced foster carer Cathy Glass. RNIB have four of her novels and I sincerely hope that they get more soon.
If like me you’re always looking for new things to read, you can find below a list of authors that I have enjoyed in the past. My preferred genres are chick flicks, true stories, fantasy, dystopia and young adult fiction.
Authors of note:
Dorothy Koomson
Cecelia Ahern
Lisa Jewell
Lauren Weisberger
Sarra Manning
Jane Fallon
Jane Green
Kate Jacobs
Sheila O’Flanagan
Jodi Picoult
R.J Palacio
Jane Costello
Jenny Colgan
Jojo Moyes
Harriet Evans
Alice Sebold
Lucy Dillon
Michele Hauf
Lucy Robinson
Gina Blaxill
Malorie Blackman
Carole Matthews
Aidan Macfarlane/Ann McPherson
Melvin Burgess
Louise Rennison
Allyson Braithwate/Ally Condie
Lindsey Kelk
Suzanne Collins
Lucy Diamond
Veronica Roth
Lisa Genova
S.J. Watson
Paula Daly
Charlaine Harris
Meg Cabot
P.C. and Kristin Cast
Sara Gruem
Cathy Glass
Recently, my portable Daisy player broke, which is a device needed to access Talking Books. As is the case for most products for the visually impaired, it would have been very pricey for me to replace it, approximately £300. Although a bit hesitant at first due to my lack of ability when it comes to technology (long live my Nokia with Talks), I decided to trial Overdrive. Overdrive is a relatively new service offered by RNIB, which allows its users to directly download Talking Books to their smart device. The app also links to other libraries, but I’m yet to master that side of things.
I have had my ipod touch for about 18 months now, which I originally got to help me learn how to use a touch screen, knowing that one day my trusty nokia will pack in (nooooo) and I’ll have to transfer to the Apple world. Having little patience for difficult tasks, well technology in general, I found myself only using my ipod touch to tell Sirri to ‘play music’ and ask him silly questions like ‘how much do you weigh?’. Hence, getting Overdrive was a big step. Maybe I should give myself more credit for my abilities or maybe the app is just really simple to use that even I can manage it with little trouble. The search facility is easily found, you just tap the ‘borrow’ button to obviously ‘borrow’ a book and then you go to your bookshelf on the RNIB Library to download the book to the app. The Overdrive app is VI friendly with clear controls for play, pause, rewind etc. I like that you can increase the speed of a book too, but I believe that facility is only available on IOS devices (if that’s what they are called). Nothing is perfect and the downside to the app is returning books with Voice Over enabled. It is really temperamental, sometimes the options appear, but more often than not when you double tap and hold, it begins to play the book instead. Nevertheless, each book you download has an expiry date, which you can choose to be 14 or 21 days and then the book will return itself to the library. You can checkout six books at a time. Overall, I’m satisfied and would definitely recommend it. It beats sending RNIB a list of books you want to read and then wait for the CDs to arrive in the post.
Whilst the Talking Books service is great, my only gripe with it is that a few times now, I have begun to read books in a series, only to find that RNIB don’t have the entire series and due to commercial reasons won’t be getting them either. I have had this problem with authors, such as Ally Condie, Veronica Roth, Charlaine Harris and P.C. and Kristin Cast. It’s quite frustrating, will I ever find out what happens next?! At present I am hooked on books written by experienced foster carer Cathy Glass. RNIB have four of her novels and I sincerely hope that they get more soon.
If like me you’re always looking for new things to read, you can find below a list of authors that I have enjoyed in the past. My preferred genres are chick flicks, true stories, fantasy, dystopia and young adult fiction.
Authors of note:
Dorothy Koomson
Cecelia Ahern
Lisa Jewell
Lauren Weisberger
Sarra Manning
Jane Fallon
Jane Green
Kate Jacobs
Sheila O’Flanagan
Jodi Picoult
R.J Palacio
Jane Costello
Jenny Colgan
Jojo Moyes
Harriet Evans
Alice Sebold
Lucy Dillon
Michele Hauf
Lucy Robinson
Gina Blaxill
Malorie Blackman
Carole Matthews
Aidan Macfarlane/Ann McPherson
Melvin Burgess
Louise Rennison
Allyson Braithwate/Ally Condie
Lindsey Kelk
Suzanne Collins
Lucy Diamond
Veronica Roth
Lisa Genova
S.J. Watson
Paula Daly
Charlaine Harris
Meg Cabot
P.C. and Kristin Cast
Sara Gruem
Cathy Glass
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